Why Didn't Sugar Think of This

Sugar is soo going to order a DD

Let's Go Down to the Disco

Sugar went out last night and met some friends who were going to buy "a" drink for Sour Patch Kids to celebrate his big one (sounds like a Cialis commercial!) Needless to say no self respecting guy can buy "a" drink, nor can the celebratee drink "a" drink and somewhere around the sixth and seventh, the imbibers (Sugar was the DD) decided there was a great dive bar with Karaoke just waiting for our group.



Sugar likes and warms to a great dive bar. She finds the sights, smells ,and bad outfits delicious. This was beyond delicious. Where did these people come from???? Most of them were much too awkward for the chess club and were also booted from the Trekkie convention.


The ultimate insult to the evening was that a couple of them could carry a tune. Who goes to Karaoke to hear marginal singing? Give Sugar some Love Me Tender that sounds like a drunk bullfrog or sit your ass down!!!


Sugar did have a chance to break out the Sugar Shimmy because Sour Patch Kids had to do a special dance with all the other BDay hos and he was too drunk to keep his hands off Awkward Ann's clammy paws. It was a thing of beauty to watch Sugar, in her slimming little black number and spike heals, insert herself into the thong of revelers, all clad in their peasant dresses and combat boots, to the rescue of the thoroughly trashed Sour Patch Kids.


After the dance a slurring Trekkie-reject came up to Sugar and said "Whaths your name causth I like your sctharf" This is why they can't get dates!

Target

So Sugar got angry at her computer at the office and so did what any self-respecting gal would do, Sugar bailed and went to Target for the beginning of the

Xmas Tree Obsession Extravaganza!

Now dear readers (both of You!) you know all about Sugar's Xmas Tree obsession

1) Decide color of obsession

2) Buy all new ornaments in that color

3) Moratorium on any package under the tree out of sync with the color scheme

4) On and on

Sugar had a wild thought in Target that maybe we'll skip the tree this year and do something unique - like a Festivas Pole!

How about one of these

He's about three feet tall and we could surround him with other Arctic paraphernalia and wrap presents in black and white only

Or how about

With blue packages!!!!

Splenda and Honey - send your thoughts.

This isn't big enough to decorate and adorn with gifts but Sugar sure did like this little number

Apparently Sugar has stumbled upon Target's new Butch Fairy line of holiday gifts

WTF

Sugar is not sure what this post was/is/should be. It just had "Tuesday" with no posting or Sugary insight. Its hanging around is making Sugar crazy. So here ya go

Sugar at a coffee plantation in Khuai?Kuaihi?Kuwaii?Coowyeee?

And Speaking of the Game

What's with the boner medication commercials? Sugar thinks they would be more entertaining if they would run the actual conversations the couples are having instead of romantic background music.

Cialis - a couple bathing in separate outdoor bathtubs
First of all maybe he doesn't have a boner because the creepy couple next door are sitting in their side-by-side bathtubs, but anywho what she says is "Honey, I like these separate tubs because when I feel around for the soft, squishy sponge - it's actually the loofah!"

More Cialis - More couples doing lots of stuff you need a boner for - like hiking, and having dinner at a restaurant. There's always a black couple, so guys don't worry black guys have those troubles too! By far my vote for let us hear the real sound track is-

The Rowing Scene - the couple is rowing in a small boat and he says "Honey we need to get out of here and call the doctor since I've had this boner for eighteen hours" She replies "Bullshit, lie down and let me hoist my sweater up on that thing - we're going to Catalina!"

OMG just saw a Flomax commercial that showed men hugging each other dicussing "weak stream" Jesus wearing a mohawk make it stop!!!

GO SOX

So Sugar has a pervy little crush on


And

Whose combined age's are probaby less than Sugar's biological years!!

And Manny - love, love, love you too.

Love (1) Becasue you're hot and a great hitter

Love (2) For the hair extensions and the casual toss of the helmet

Love (3) for two sons - both named Manny!

Gimme LESSS!!!

This is an unbelievable train wreck that Sugar just can't stop watching. Sugar happened upon this when her espoused (in the spirit of the blog Sugar will call him Sour Patch Kids) had it discreetly playing behind his "Financial" News. Oh yeah Sour Patch Kids, oops you did it again!

The wig looked good though Brit, and you made Sugar's day by being oh so much fatter than Sugar. You also made Sugars lackluster moves seem almost Baryshnikov-esque.

For these things, Sugar thanks you. And also for allowing Sugar to refer to this as a Britney